Reviews, in haiku form

Hairspray
Christopher Walken:
oh, how my heart leaps for your
suave and sprightly form.

The End of Mr Y
Physics, Derrida
and really kinky sex: this
is my kind of book.

Life
Wants to have it all -
quirky lead, hot babe, Zen - but
Life sucks Buddha's balls.

Blue Velvet
Helen made me watch
as Frank beat poor Dorothy.
A young Kyle's cute, though.

John Thomas and Lady Jane
Not finished yet, but
I'm getting there. Lawrence is
kind of a prick, hey?

Soko - 'I'll kill her'
Revenge fantasies
sound so goddamn whimsical
with a French accent.

The Sex Mook
Okay, a blatant
plug for small and brainy press.
What? It's a good read.